Late to the Pajama Party

I am always late. Always. Despite being the punctual one in my family (sorry Mom & Dad, but it's just not our skill set) I am the late one in the real world. I am always "working on it" and "getting so much better" but eventually I will have to accept that I can neither pass by a puppy without saying hello nor gauge the correct amount of time it takes for me to get myself out the door.

I am also late when it comes to trends. And I usually change my mind when I see the potential for comfort. For example, I was completely anti-leggings until I realized that they were like tights for people who don't hate their crotch*.

Ponchos and capes seemed silly and over dramatic until I realized it would be like walking around wrapped in a blanket. Also, they're fantastically silly and over dramatic!

The latest trend that I've turncoated on is pajama pants. They were all over the spring runways and I scoffed until I realized that it meant we could wear pajama pants. In public! To parties! With no judgement! 

Jonathan Saunders

Jil Sander

Stella McCartney

Antonio Marras

As always, I decided to try this trend with a cheap Goodwill find before splurging. And I lucked out with a fantastic Brooks Brothers pajama set. So after the party I can bumble home, throw on the pajama top, shove the boy over and be done with it.

As I put them on I wondered if I was brave enough to do it. Then I thought about my upcoming quarter century birthday and I thought, 'now is the time to experiment with stupid trends. If I don't wear these, what will I regret wearing later?'

Because I think a crucial part of getting older is looking at pictures of yourself when you were younger and thinking "I'm so glad I obsessively wore sunscreen. And so sad that I wore that while doing so."

It's all about the accessories here. Heels are crucial.

Besides, this trend is so oddly glamorous. It takes a real woman not to wear real pants. Like Auntie Mame or Alexis from Dynasty or Norma Desmond. By the way, after 4-6 glasses of champagne, I do a spot on Swanson impression if you needed any impetus to buy me a drink.

Eat it, Lalique

P.S.  For you. And me. Mostly me.


*that said, I want to make one thing abundantly clear: leggings aren't pants. Not gym pants, not pants pants, not pants under a long shirt. They just aren't pants.

Happy Belated Halloween!

Happy Halloween!

Hope you all had a fabulous Halloween! The snowstorm forced The Boy and I to cancel our trip home to MA which would have been unfortunate if it hadn't also stranded some other Mass-bound friends at our house. Their loss was our gain and we hunkered down with apple cider donuts, beer and plenty takeout menus.

We had a much better time than she did.

We ate, we played games, we giggled over costumes and we watched the snow come down with eager little faces.

Ok, so maybe not eager, but pretty awesome, no? We were the Tennenbaums and if you haven't seen that movie, go do so now. No, seriously, now. Go. I'll wait.

 

We had a blast and now I have a faux fur coat that I can put on and feel instantly awesome. In fact, I may just slowly but permanently transform into Margot Tenenbaum. I tried to dress Rue up as Mordecai but he wasn't having it. 

P.S. Weekly Zumba update: someone spiked the Old Lady punch. The Ancients were feeling sassy as anything and I just loved it.

Fish, flowers and Federer

saldjfh!!!!uiiehr3lsjdfb$alkjds!jfjklh.

That's pretty much what the commentary in my head sounds like at the moment, my patient readers. I apologize for the lack of updates, especially given the immense amount of news, both in the world at large and, more specifically, in my world at large. Because what is a blog if not a digital manifestation of our human desire to say,"me, me, me, MEEEEEEEE"?

I may or may not be a little punchy, by the way. Lack of sleep, frantic scheduling and over-excitement can do that to a girl.

Anyways, to return to the matter at hand, here is what's new (in list form. duh.)

1) I'm going to Switzerland! 
How random is that? When I told my mom I'm not even sure she believed me. Like, who goes to Switzerland? This kid, that's who.

Ahh, designer of army knives, home of Federer, creator of the Red Cross and purveyors of chocolate. I've been told it will involve bakeries, chocolateries and segue tours. How awesome is that? It's a blogging trip, no less, so get ready for some serious and regular updates.

2) He put a ring on it. Here's a little preview. More pictures to come.

3) I'm in a short film!
I'm actually in the middle of shooting right now, which explains the sleep deprivation. But I'm getting paid to do what I love, so it's 1000% worth it. It's a very moody sort of film with lots of long stares and significant moments that sometimes make me giggle. But sometimes they make me feel like this:

4) It's spring. Honest to God, flower-blooming, nose-running, eyes-itching, scooting-weather spring. And I couldn't be more excited. Or sneezy. Really, not sure if I could be more sneezy if I tried.

5) I got some fish! There was a giant tank chock full of goldfish that started dying off due to the heat and stress and, I suspect, overfeeding. So I rescued 3 and took them home with me. As soon as they get settled and I get them out of their Chinese soup container I'll post pictures.

6) And, in the real world, a bad man was killed and some people got married. More about that later.

So, on that note, I'm off to bed to revel in being able to sleep past 6:00am tomorrow.

Merry Christmas, Zombies

Sooo... I have an obsession that I've kept seperate from this blog, because it's weird and a little gross. It also brings out a side of me that, I'm told, is less than pleasant. I can't remember when it started, but a long, long time ago I became...obsessed with zombies. Too obsessed to even be embarrassed. I have a plan, a compound, and a list of people who can come.

At any rate, if you don't watch the Walking Dead, you should probably skip this post. Sorry. If you're not obsessed with zombies, you should probably skip it too. Or get obsessed.

Things I Learned from Walking Dead

1) Binoculars are an essential part of every survival kit. Obviously, I know someone has to be on watch at all times, but I hadn't thought of binoculars.

2) Crossbow is a super, extra, awesome weapon that I should probably learn how to use right now. I thought I thought of every weapon: machete, shotgun, baseball bat, shovel, ax (although use caution, because they get stuck). But the crossbow is almost perfect: quiet but deadly. If they make ones that reload automatically I'm so sold.

3) Horses are good, if only because zombies will eat them instead of you if you play your cards right*. I am very pro-car in apocolyptic situations, but I am now open-minded to horses.

4) The tiny nerdy/geeky** ones are worthwhile. Obviously, tech skills and quick minds are important skills to have, but before watching Walking Dead I'm not sure I'd let this guy on the compound.

Image courtesy of AMC.com

5) Personalities matter. Despite my belief that the zombie apocolypse is a feasible event, I'm pretty optimistic. I figured that if someone had useful life skills, any personality quirks would be dealt with or eradicated. New rule: no racists, homophobes, sociopaths or people who really, really annoy me. That's a good rule for life, actually.

Things I Would Teach (the characters)
of Walking Dead

1) Unless you actually see the body, do not assume your spouse is dead. Therefore, do not have sex with someone else. And if they are dead, try and wait at least a month before having sex with his best friend. That's another good rule for life.

2) Don't be squeamish about shooting kids. Zombies are zombies are smaller, faster zombies. Nip that shit in the bud.

3) Tin cans are good alarms in a pinch. Razor wire with bells over a ditch are better. Do the work, reap the rewards. Also, dogs are good too.

4) STAY AWAY FROM CITIES. If you are surviving in the styx, stay there. If you're in the city, leave.

5) When you're surrounded by flesh eating zombies in a ransacked city, for the love of God, take shit. It's not looting, you weiners, it's taking shit that you need or even want.

*I love horses. I would never advocate eating a horse unless the only other option was being eaten myself.
**I know there is a difference between these words that is all-important and it's super insulting to confuse a nerd with a geek. Whatever.

In No Particular Order

A list of women that helped shape and influence me.

1) Patti Smith*

Her book, her songs, her cover of Smells Like Teen Spirit, her self.

2) Carol Burnett

She is the reason I am the way I am. She is the funniest woman on the planet.

3) Tina Fey

Because she is awesome. To see her being awesome, click here.

4) Marilyn Monroe

Recently I've shied away from her because of the sad girls of my generation following in her unsteady footsteps. But she was more than a tragic figure: she was funny, curvy and a brilliant actress.

5) Marlene Dietrich

She was a grandmother when this was taken.
Androgynous sexpot extraordinaire. World's sexiest grandmother.

7) Amelia Earhart

I got an antique piece of luggage from the Amelia Earhart collection, which led to a lengthy Wikipedia binge. The suitcase may need to go through several voodoo anti-jinxing rituals before I'll bring it on a plane, but I'm awfully glad I got to learn so much about this extraordinary woman.

8) Rosa Parks

Did you know she wasn't just pivotal in the Civil Rights movement but also in bringing rapists to justice? Check it out.

9) Holly Golightly

Diamonds, aging, friends. This character inspired the hell out of me from the screen and the page.

10) Eugenie Clark, the Shark Lady

She helped me remember that smart girls are cool in the face of bullies.


Thank you.

*Did I already say that? I'm getting blogger's deja vu.